Motivated

Couples In Quarantine: 77% Said They Would Do It Again


by Carrie Borzillo - July 27, 2020


Photo Credit: by Radha Madhava, flickr.com
Photo Credit: by Radha Madhava, flickr.com

Being locked down together during this Covid-19 pandemic can either make or break a couple. Some recent studies have shown an increase in divorces since March, while others are showing it’s made couples closer with each other and with their families. Earlier this month, Canada Pharmacy Online conducted its own survey of approximately 150 men and women between the ages of 18- and 60-years-old from every region of the United States to find out just how they are doing in quarantine with their partner. We asked about everything from their sex lives to whether their partner is getting on their nerves and here’s what we found…

Sex In Quarantine: Hot or Not?

One might think that more time on your hands might lead to more sex. That might be the case for couples without children. But, when you’re a couple with kids working from home, caring for little ones 24/7, and home-schooling your kids, there’s not much extra time for sexual relations. The good news is the frequency of sex that the couples had during quarantine has not gone down at least.

When asked, “How has the quarantine changed the frequency of how much you have sex?” the average answers from the respondents was that it was slightly higher than usual. Many others reported no change in the frequency, a few reported an increase, and another few reported a decrease. On average, though, the frequency of sex has not changed drastically in either direction. We saw similar results for the question about the quality of sex with their partners during the quarantine. More than half the respondents said the quality of their sex since being in quarantine is somewhere between the same as before and a little better.

Not surprisingly, when given five choices (talk/hang out, have sex, watch movies/tv, cook together, play games) for their favorite activity to do with their partner during the lockdown, sex came in fourth - almost tying with cooking together. The total rankings went like this: watch movies and TV (36.69%), talk/ hang out (27.34%), cook together (12.95%), have sex (12.23%), and play games (10.79%).

Rediscovering Your Partner

To gauge their relationship happiness before the lockdown started, we asked our participants to rate how happy they were before March. They started out strong with 71% happiness level, which translates into "very happy" on our scale of 1 to 100. When asked how happy they are in their relationships now, nearly four months into lockdown, the answers only dipped three points to 68%, which still puts them in the pretty darned happy range.

This could be due in part to another key question we asked, which resulted in the highest positive numbers of the survey, which was this — Did you learn anything new about your partner during quarantine? 96% of the participants answered yes. According to Ohio-based relationship coach and best-selling author, Sharon Pope, rediscovery of your partner is a great way to reconnect.

"One of the ways I think our marriages fall off the rails is when we stop being curious about one another. We assume we know everything there is to know about our partners, but that’s not true. Even after being together for many years, we’re not the same people we were years – or decades – ago," writes Pope on her self-help website.

"We’re changing and so are our spouses," she continues. "What we want or prefer now is likely very different than what we wanted and liked ten or twenty years ago. Also, most of the things we think we know about our partners are assumptions on our parts, because we’ve never really asked."

One relationship tip Pope offers to help learn more about your partner in lockdown, or anytime, is to create a list of five things you each need in order to be happy in life, but none of them can have anything to do with your spouse or children. Each person shares their list with their partner with no debating, criticizing, or interrupting. Lastly, identify what you know now that you didn't know previously, either about yourself or your partner. Chances are, you'll be surprised by your partner's answers and learn something new.

Play Together, Stay Together

Another key factor to their happiness could be that couples who have fun together, tend to stay together. When asked, "Are you having fun with your partner during quarantine?" 72% said yes, 15% said no, and 13% aren't quite sure yet. Research conducted by the University of Denver showed that couples who make time for fun activities together are more likely to keep the romance alive and stay together.

"When couples first start dating they usually spend a significant amount of time engaging in fun activities together and spending quality time together. Most people believe that the fun and spark in their relationship will last forever, but over time with all the work deadlines, shuffling kids, household chores, and the everyday boring routine, taking time to have fun often takes a back seat," writes Kim Morse, a certified master relationship coach, on her self-help blog Sailing Happily Ever After.

Photo Credit: by @CPOHealth
Photo Credit: by @CPOHealth

Breaking Up in Lockdown

In the past few months since the global Covid-19 pandemic shook everyone’s lives, a notable amount of famous couples have called it quits. Among them are Kelly Clarkson and Brandon Blackstock, Dr. Dre and Nicole Young, Mary-Kate Olsen and Olivier Sarkozy, Julianne Hough and Brooks Laich, "The Bachelor" stars Colton Underwood and Cassie Randolph, Kristin Cavallari and Jay Butler, Kacey Musgraves and Ruston Kelly, and Ryan Seacrest and Shayna Taylor — just to name a few!

Famous or not, relationship experts aren't surprised there are so many couples calling it quits during this tumultuous time. "If a couple is having trouble, most of their interactions will be neutral or negative. But now (tension) is constant and in their face and they're not able to have their typical routines, like doing their own things," relationship coach Lee Wilson recently told USA Today.

Our study showed that only 6% of the people we surveyed broke up with the partner during the lockdown. But, that doesn't mean the other resounding 94% have had it easy. When asked on a scale of zero (not at all) to five (off the charts) how much their partner got on their nerves during quarantine, the answers came out with an average of 3.6, which means moderately so.

Photo Credit: by @CPOHealth
Photo Credit: by @CPOHealth

That said, they are not fighting any more than usual. When asked if they are getting into more arguments during the lockdown, only 20.14% said yes they argued more, 29.50% claimed no they got into fewer arguments, and 50.36% said there was no change in the number of arguments they had during this time.

Overall, the participants in our Couples in Quarantine survey thrived in their relationships during this lockdown. When asked, “If you had to do this all over again, would you be happy to be quarantined with this same partner?” 77% said yes. Likewise, 52% of those polled said the forced time together has actually strengthened their relationship.

Photo Credit: by @CPOHealth
Photo Credit: by @CPOHealth

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